The Power of Praise

I have always been a journal-keeper. It started with a beautiful little red floral fabric book my mom bought me when I was about 7. Followed by a Strawberry Shortcake locking diary, and various notebooks with beautiful covers through high school and college. After graduating, I moved to blank books (instead of lined) because I was so inspired by the art journals of Teesha Moore. (She is such an amazing, creative genius! She deserves her own post- another day.)Sadly, I never loved my own art journal pages as much as I love Teesha's, but keeping an art journal is a lot cheaper than therapy. (And more fun, I should imagine.)
Now, since becoming a mother, I'm sad to say my journaling habit has really suffered. I still write, but my entries are in a dozen different places now: in a notebook, on the computer, on the back of a church bulletin, etc. I have vowed to myself that one of these days I WILL print/tear out/gather them all into one binder.
I find it rather ironic that the memories that will be the most precious to me in my old age(mothering my young children) are the ones that rarely are recorded. I have done some scrapbook-style memory keeping, but just haven't found time for it in the last two years.
So, this morning, I was looking for a certain Word file on the computer and came across this journal entry I typed well over a year ago during a few stolen moments. It spoke to me, and I thought it might speak to you.
Here it is:
October 4, 2006
As a teacher, I have always known about the power of praise to get kids to do what you want them to do. But I never considered its power in my own life. Lately, I have really felt the uplifting and encouraging power of a kind word spoken in my direction. Last week, a girl from my playgroup watched me interact with Sister at My Gym while toting Brother in the Baby Bjorn. After about 40 minutes she looked at me and remarked (with true admiration in her eyes), "Wow! You do such a great job with two of them!" I was startled and thrilled. I have not thought of myself as doing great with two- I have thought of myself as surviving with two. To hear her say that really encouraged my heart.
It happened again today at playgroup. A new mom, Kimberly, was asking me about how difficult it was with two. As we were talking, she kept making statements like, "I’m amazed that you can be so upbeat even though you’re still getting up with your baby in the night." and "Your daughter isn’t in preschool? You’re a tough woman! I’d be begging to drop one of them off somewhere!" She too was being genuine in her praise, and it felt so good to hear. Because I AM trying to be upbeat even though I’m tired, and I DID make a conscious decision that preschool isn’t right for Sister at this time even though it would be a lot easier for me.
So, I write this journal entry to remember these moments; not only because they uplift me but so that I never forget the power of a kind word in another person’s life. Moms work hard and are largely unrecognized for what we do. After all, it all seems so mundane. Change the diapers. Run errands. Prepare meals. Entertain our kids. Clean the house. At face value, it doesn’t seem all that worthy of praise. And yet, we deserve some recognition and appreciation for what we do- it’s of the upmost importance!
I’m going to mindfully practice praising my fellow mommies from now on. I know it will be as much a blessing in their lives as it was in mine.
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I'm going to praise at least 3 mommies I know this week with a hand-written note. (One is my S-I-L, one is a woman who faithfully brings her 3 young kids to church every week by herself -Dad won't come, and one is just a friend who I also think is a great mom.) Can you think of a mommy in your life to encourage this week?

One more thing- a recipe for you that is so yummy on a cold day!
Slow Cooker Turkey Chili
(from the kitchen of the ultra-healthy Sister-In-Law)
Makes 6 servings
Ingredients:
1 1/4 lb. Lean ground turkey
1 large onion, chopped
1 garlic clove, minced
1 ½ cups frozen corn kernels
1 red bell pepper, chopped
1 green bell pepper, chopped
1 (28 oz.) Can crushed tomatoes
1 (15 oz.) Can black beans, rinsed and drained
1 (8 oz) can tomato sauce
1 (1.25 oz) package chili seasoning mix
½ tsp salt
Toppings: shredded cheese (Colby and Monterey Jack blend)
Directions:
1. Cook first 3 ingredients in large skillet over medium high heat, stirring until turkey crumbles and is no longer pink. Spoon mixture into a slow cooker; stir in corn and next 7 ingredients until well blended. 2. Cook at high 4 to 5 hours or at low 6 to 8 hours. Serve with desired toppings. Yummy with tortilla or Frito chips!

Envy my mental energy

Last night I enjoyed a phone conversation with one of my favorite people: my Grandma. We were talking about my sister-in-law (known hereafter as SIL) and how self-disciplined and fit and healthy she is. And it's true. She runs 4 or 5 times per week, eats very healthy foods, does like 100 sit-ups every morning... hey! As I write this I am amazed that we get on so well. Disciplined runner-types who start the day with sit-ups and eat big bowls of salad at every meal aren't usually my type of pal. But my SIL is a saint; truly one of the sweetest, kindest Christian women you will meet, so I tolerate the excessive helathiness. Anyway, Grandma was going on and on about what a wonder SIL is and how she keeps such a neat little figure and how she's lost every ounce of that baby weight. I agreed completely, and then Grandma went silent for a moment (very rare indeed.) Finally, she said, "Well, dear, and you have so much mental energy!"
HA! HA!
I started laughing really hard, "Well, thanks Grandma! Nobody has ever given me that compliment before!"
She started stammering and justifying it, "Well, it's true! You write all those grants and you have so many ideas. It takes a lot of energy to do that!"
I agreed so she could be off the hook. It's just too bad that mental energy doesn't help you lose weight and stay in shape, or I'd put that SIL to shame. And if only this mental energy of mine could do the laundry or clean up the 1 gazillion toys that are littering my den floor...
But maybe you can get a glimpse of my hulking mental energy on this blog.
Mental energy. Ha!

I will leave you with a few blog entries I have enjoyed this week:
Andrea has some yummy-looking recipes for homemade salad dressing (get to it, mental energy!)
Holly gives tips on how to manage life with young children. She has 8 (yes, 8) kids, but the tips are helpful for someone with even one measly ol' little kid.
Meg is doing a month of puppets. (I have a thing for puppets. More on that another day.) This one is especially beautiful and doable.
This blog is just right up my alley. Artful parenting? Sign me up!

OK, my mental energy needs some Gatorade before the kiddies wake up. Gotta go ice down the old brain. They say using too much mental energy is just as bad as using none at all.
Sorry- I just can't help myself!

thanks Beck! and a book recommendation

Well.
If you're reading this chances are that you found me via the QUEEN of Canadian family blogs - Beck. Beck suspects we may be long-lost twins, and if that were found to be true, it would confirm my childhood suspicions that I did in fact have a sister whom my parents traded for my brother. (Wanting a boy and all that rot.) Beck, are you also a princess of a small and unknown, yet incredibly wealthy, country? Because I was always convinced that I was one of those too.
Anyway, thanks for visiting my little blog, and thanks a million for the shout-out, Beck!

Lately, when I've had five minutes here or there to read, I've been reading Mitten Strings for God: Reflections for Mothers in a Hurry by Katrina Kenison. I will admit that I approached this book warily. I admire mothers of all kinds and respect that there are many approaches to parenting. I have strong opinions about how I parent and what is right for my family, but that doesn't mean that I think other people with different approaches are wrong. (Unless they are the parents of the child who sat next to me in a restaurant last week and who was an ABSOLUTE TERROR.) But in general, I think this parenting thing is really very hard and we all do the best we can and don't need to give each other crap.
Having said that, I will say that I am always rather skeptical about some of the newer-age approaches to parenting. (While also finding bits and pieces that I think are brilliant about those approaches.) At first glance, I thought Mitten Strings For God was going to be a little too far out for me. I looked at the chapters titled things like, "Peace" and "Rhythm" and "Healing" and thought I had bought a lemon. (Actually, a lemon scented incense stick.) Now having read several chapters, I think it is the best parenting book I have ever read.
Kenison's writing voice is encouraging, entertaining, and authentic. She doesn't demand that I mother my children in a certain way, she just gently pushes me toward being the mother I am, only better. Hers is not a book of activities, but after I read it for a while my head is spinning with ideas. It is the kind of book I will keep on my nightstand and reread frequently. I highly recommend it. If anyone else has a parenting book that really impacted them and helped them to be a better parent, please say so in the comments.
"In stillness, we find our peace. Knowing peace at home, we bring peace into the world."- Katrina Kenison

Book list and a mini-rant

Mini-rant first:

Last night my husband and I enjoyed watching the Superbowl together. I am a football fan, but usually the Superbowl is a let-down. Not this year! It was a great game: lots of fun to watch.

Unfortunately, I also had to watch a man on fire plunge himself into water, a different man freaking out in what looked like a police station room (punching the wall and throwing furniture around), a man being very scary and intimidating a woman, and a firefighter desperately trying to perform CPR on what obviously was a dead woman while his peers watched. Oh, I almost forgot the most memorable one- a woman lying on a table with a drill going into her skull.

So, from where did all these lovely and restful bedtime images spring?

COMMERCIALS. Freaking commercials.

Apparently the networks think that by showing us these thrilling and "enticing" little clips of their regular network shows, we will make sure to tune in at showtime.

Pardon my French, but what the hell is going on?

When did this type of imagery become OK for primetime viewing?

We don't watch that much TV anymore, but I have been noticing the inappropriate nature of commercials more and more. It really hit me last Thanksgiving, when I was trying to watch the Macy's Day Parade with Sister. Parades are right up her alley, and I just knew that she'd get a thrill from the floats, balloons, marching bands, etc.

It was a BIG ZONK. We found ourselves either watching a seemingly endless stream of scary/sexy commercials, or listening to talking heads TELL us about the parade while it passed behind them, or watching Al Roker interview some of NBC's prime time stars who were at the parade (so they could plug their shows) while the parade passed behind them, or were seeing a Broadway musical number (the only thing worth watching.) And most of the commercials were TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE for family audiences. One that stands out in my memory was for the big hit show, "Heroes," where teenaged protaganists were doing all kinds of thing that were "thrilling" like leaping from buildings or creating fireballs and explosions or engaging in hand-to-hand combat. Just the type of thing I wanted my 3-year old to see on Thanksgiving morning.

After about 30 minutes we turned the blasted thing off. (What took me so long?)

People, I'm over it.

Now I'm not quite ready to put my TV on the curb with yesterday's poopie diaper. But I'm getting closer every day.

I'll wrap up this mini-rant (not so mini...sorry) for now, but I will revisit this. Mamas, we've got to do something. I mean, what if I had an 8 year old Brother instead of a 1 year old Brother who wanted to watch some football with his Daddy? What would I do then?
Ay, Carumba!


On another note, Beck- here are some book recommendations for you. Sorry there aren't more- it's been hectic around here with my grant-writing work. Here are some books that any self-respecting library should keep on the shelves:

For kids:

Fancy Nancy and the latest Fancy Nancy and the Posh Puppy - Sister LOVES these

Pssst! by Adam Rex

Knuffle Bunny and the latest Knuffle Bunny Too by Mo Willems

First the Egg by Laura Seeger

Rainstorm- very cool wordless picture book

The Little Red Fish by Tae-Eun Yoo



For older kids and adolescents:

The Wednesday Wars by Gary Schmidt

Good Masters! Sweet Ladies! Voices from a Medieval Village by Laura Amy Schlitz

Others by Laura Amy Schlitz that are good are A Drowned Maiden's Hair and The Hero Schliemann: The Dreamer Who Dug for Troy

Oops, out of time. I'll try to post a few more this week.

new friends visiting the sand box

Did you know that $1.99 spent at Target for a tube of plastic turtles and frogs can buy a lot of backyard fun? I was trying to spice up the sandbox a little bit (it worked!) but eventually our little plastic friends decided that they wanted to go explore in the yard too.
I try to stay away from the plastic stuff more and more, but when you're talking about sandboxes and outdoor play, plastic is still in consideration. Grateful today that the thermometer is starting to rise again. Please don't be jealous, northern friends. I'll pay for it in July when it's 100 degrees!

My only regret was not buying two tubes of critters. Sharing these was really hard for my children. Sister, especially. You'd think that being 3 and 1/2 she'd do better with the sharing thing than Brother. But it seems Sister is going through a little hoarding stage lately. Thursday at playgroup I found her sitting on the floor clutching all the dolls and princess finery she could get her little hands on. She didn't play with it, she just held it. It was rather amusing, and since the other kids (mostly boys) didn't want it, I let it go. Later I asked her what her best part of the day was. Her reply?

"When I hog-ded the dolls." Yes, the DH has taught her to say "hogged" as in "Are you hogging all the toys?"

We're real classy people.

winning is fun!

And the winner is...Deanne! Hooray! Deanne, I will be emailing you your Amazon.com gift certificate in the next 24 hours. Congratulations!

As you see, we did use the potty. Sister was pretty puzzled by the whole thing but she played along nicely. And I received quite a lecture from the DH about statistics and probability and my method. I told him to be quiet- he was making my head hurt. Math is such a nasty thing. If I want to give away my prize in a statistically biased manner, I will. (But next time I'll use a random number generator like everyone else!)

And guess what... I WON SOMETHING! And yes, it was the CUPCAKE TOTE! I am beside myself. I never win cool stuff like this. So, thanks Jessica!

469 names in the potty

All is on hold while I write 469 names on tiny pieces of paper and put them in Sister's potty for a drawing...
Not.
Sorry, gang, but I just don't have the time. Never in my wackiest dreams did I think that 469 people would enter my little contest. BUT, I do think the potty should still be involved. Sister too.
So, I am going to do it a little differently. Sister is going to draw numbers out of the potty.
First, she will draw from three slips of paper that say either "one digit number" "two digit number" or "three digit number."
That will narrow it down.
Then she will draw numbers 0 to 9 (depending on how many digits from the first drawing.)
That should give me my winner.
We will do all of this after naptime today and I'll report back here.
And if you don't like how I'm doing it, sorry. You'll just have to report me to the Bureau of Blog Giveaways, Contests, and Related Nonsense.